The Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS) released yet another green jobs report that has green advocates gushing in ways they couldn’t if they actually read past the first page.

As we have noted (here, here, here, and here), the BLS definition of green jobs is so bizarre that the total counts are meaningless.

For instance, according to the BLS, the septic-tank and portable-toilet servicing industry has nearly three times as many green jobs as are in the solar, wind, geothermal, and biomass power utilities combined. Not only that, but the lead appears to be widening. There has been some mucking around with the definitions, but compared to the total from last year’s report, the renewable utilities green job count rose by 1,129, while those in the septic-tank and related services industry grew by 1,599 jobs.

The new study will also tell the careful reader (almost all the fun stuff is in Table 3) that not only are there more than three times as many green jobs in trash collecting as there are in scientific research and development services, but the increase in green trash collecting employment outpaced the green employment increase in the scientific R&D services by nearly 3,700 jobs.

So, if more septic-tank pumpers, garbage collectors, and used merchandise retailers (think Salvation Army and used comic book stores) are the new green jobs you’ve been hoping for, this most recent BLS green jobs report will bring you great comfort.

If, on the other hand, you find these BLS green jobs reports a total waste of taxpayer money, keep your fingers crossed. The reports are on the BLS’s list of cuts they will make to comply with sequestration.